+ 599 Funny Senior Quotes Make Your Life Llessed

If you are looking for funny sayings, drop a funny humorous hearing to show attention on Facebook, please refer to this article. The article will fully synthesize for you the Funny Senior Quotes about love, the most difficult and hottest funny quotes on social networks.

Funny Senior Quotes is causing fever today

1. “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”
– Abraham Lincoln

2. “If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?”
– Abraham Lincoln

3. “The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.”
– Abraham Lincoln

4. “The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets.”
– Al McGuire

5. “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
– Alan Dundes

6. “Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”
– Albert Camus

7. “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”
– Albert Einstein

8. “The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.”
– Albert Einstein

9. “All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.”
– Alexander Woollcott

10. “War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.”
– Ambrose Bierce

11. “It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.”
– Andy Borowitz

12. “The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”
– Andy Rooney

13. “At every party there are two kinds of people – those who want to go home and those who don’t. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other.”
– Ann Landers

14. “If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else.”
– Ann Landers

16. “Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too.”
– Anton Chekhov

17. “I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.”
– Arthur C. Clarke

18. “My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.”
– Ashleigh Brilliant

19. “To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.”
– Ashleigh Brilliant

Funny Senior Quotes slash the wind on Facebook

Funny Senior Quotes slash the wind on Facebook

1. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

2. “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright

3. “I find television very educational. Every time someone turns it on, I go in the other room and read a book.” – Groucho Marx

4. “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.” – Mark Twain

5. “If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” – Yogi Berra

6. “There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

7. “It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.” – Robert Benchley

8. “Luck is what you have left over after you give 100 percent.” – Langston Coleman

9. “Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.” – Kyle Chandler

10. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles Schulz

11. “It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” – Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes

12. “Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget tossing in the lifeboats.” – Voltaire

13. “When I hear somebody sigh, Life is hard, I am always tempted to ask, ‘Compared to what?’” – Sydney Harris

14. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” – Joe Girard

15. “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.” – Robert Frost

16. “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” – George Bernard Shaw

17. “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.” – Mark Twain

18. “Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese.” – Billie Burke

19. “The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.” – Maureen Dowd

20. “It takes less time to do things right than to explain why you did it wrong.” – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Funny Senior Quotes humor about life

Funny Senior Quotes humor about life

1. “The key to success is not through achievement but through enthusiasm.” – Malcolm Forbes

2. “I cannot afford to waste my time making money.” – Louis Agassiz

3. “Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.” – Robert Bloch

4. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” – Betty Reese

5. “The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” – Albert Einstein

6. “Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” – Oscar Wilde

7. “When you do not know what you are doing and what you are doing is the best – that is inspiration.” – Robert Bresson

8. “My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.” – Dave Barry

9. “People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” – A.A. Milne

10. “I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong.” – Benjamin Franklin1. “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.” – Mae West

12. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison

13. “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” – Jack London

14. “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go.” – Dr. Seuss

15. “A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” – Unknown

16. “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” – Mark Twain

17. “Life is like a sewer – what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.” – Tom Lehrer

18. “Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.” – Isaac Asimov

19. “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” – Truman Capote

20. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing; that’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar

Funny Senior Quotes most difficult to support

Funny Senior Quotes most difficult to support

1. “If you’re going to be able to look back on something and laugh about it, you might as well laugh about it now.” – Marie Osmond

2. “I have a simple philosophy: Fill what is empty. Empty what is full. Scratch where it itches.” – Alice Roosevelt Longworth

3. “Even a stopped clock is right twice every day. After some years, it can boast of a long series of successes.” – Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

4. “You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t possibly live long enough to make them all yourself.” – Sam Levenson

5. “Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.” – Franklin P. Jones

6. “You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.” – Woody Allen

7. “The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.”

8. “Dear life, when I said: ‘Can my day get any worse?’ It was rhetorical, not a challenge.”

9. “Cleaning up is just putting stuff in less obvious places.”

10. “It amazes me how much exercise and extra fires sound alike.”

11. “I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot. Sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.”

12. “In m defense, I was left unsupervised.”

13. “Taking naps sounds so childish. I prefer to call them horizontal life pauses.”

14. I walk around like everything is fine. But deep down, inside my show, my sock is sliding off.”

15. “It’s called Karma, and it’s pronounced, ‘Haha, f*** you ‘.”

16. “If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”

17. “I think my guardian angel drinks.”

18. “So it turns out that being an adult is really just Googling how to do stuff.”

19. “I don’t think there will be enough coffee or middle fingers for this Monday.”

20. “Don’t give up on your dreams. Keep sleeping!”

Funny Senior Quotes most poisonous

Funny Senior Quotes most poisonous

1. Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.
– Thomas Eddison

2. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? – George Carli

3. If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big. – Donald Trump

4. My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. – Mitch Hedberg

5. “You must pay for your sins. If you have already paid, please ignore this notice.” — Sam Levenson

6. “It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare.” — Lisa Lieberman-Wang

7. Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. – Mark Twain

8. “I have to be successful because I like expensive things.” — Lisa Lieberman-Wang

9. “Hating people is like burning down your own home to get rid of a rat.” — Harry Emerson Fosdick

10. I am blessed with a funny gene that makes me enjoy life. – Karan Patel

11. “Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway.“ – Robert Downey Jr.

12. “Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.” – Terry Pratchett

13. “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.” – George Carlin

14. “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” – Albert Einstein

15. “I figured something out. The future is unpredictable.” – John Green

16. “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.” – Reba McEntire

17. “You grow up the day you have your first real laugh – at yourself.” – Ethel Barrymore

18. “A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.” – Frank Zappa

19. “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” – Dale Carnegie

20. “Aspire to inspire before we expire.” – Eugene Bell Jr

Funny Senior Quotes most hegemony humor

Funny Senior Quotes most hegemony humor

1. “I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched.” – Edgar Allan Poe

2. “Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!” – Dr. Seuss

3. “Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.”
– Charles J. Sykes

4. “By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost

5. “Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.” – Woody Allen

6. “Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished – If you’re alive it isn’t.” – Richard Bach

7. “We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know.” – W. H. Auden

8. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers

9. “Optimist: someone who figures that taking a step backward after taking a step forward is not a disaster, it’s more like a cha-cha.” – Robert Brault

10. “Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers

11. “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”– Abraham Lincoln

12. “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.”– Alan Dundes

13. “The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.”– Andy Rooney

14. “If you want your children to listen, try talking softly to someone else.”
– Ann Landers

15. “The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.”– Bertrand Russell

16. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”– Bernard Baruch

17. “The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”– Bill Watterson

18. “Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.”– Bill Vaughan

19. “A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”– Bob Hope

20. “A day without laughter is a day wasted.”– Charlie Chaplin

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