+ 599 Funny Halloween Quotes to Send Shivers Down Your Spine

Everyone knows that October 31st (aka Halloween) is the spookiest night of the year. The holiday really is just an excuse to gorge yourself on candy and play dress-up. This All Hallows’ Eve, impress your followers with a snap of your awesome costume teamed with the perfect caption. Here, Funny Halloween Quotes that will help you get the most likes this fright night.

Humorous Quotes For Halloween

Humorous Quotes For Halloween

1. “Anyone could see that the wind was a special wind this night, and the darkness took on a special feel because it was All Hallows’ Eve.” Ray Bradbury, American Author

2. “During the day, I don’t believe in ghosts. At night, I’m a little more open-minded.” Unknown

3. “Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.” William Shakespeare, Macbeth

4. “Believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see.” Edgar Allan Poe, American Writer

5. “Where there is no imagination there is no horror.” Arthur Conan Doyle, British Writer

6. “Villainy wears many masks, none so dangerous as the mask of virtue.” Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow

7. “No good deed will I do again.” Elphaba, Wicked

8. “Witch parking. All others will be toad.” Unknown

9. “Goodbye cruel world.” Winifred Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

10. “The world turned upside down—in a good way—for one black velvet night.” Karen Fortunati, American Author

11. “There is something at work in my soul, which I do not understand.” Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

12. “Fear,’ the doctor said, ‘is the relinquishment of logic, the willing relinquishing of reasonable patterns. We yield to it or we fight it, but we cannot meet it halfway.’” Shirley Jackson, The Haunting of Hill House

13. “I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth. I heard many things in hell.” Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

14. “Clothes make a statement. Costumes tell a story.” Mason Cooley, American Aphorist

15. “Not every witch lives in Salem.” Unknown

16. “We make up horrors to help us cope with the real ones.” Stephen King, American Author

17. ” I dropped the candies into the children’s bags, thinking: You small mortals don’t realize the power of your stories.” Karen Russell, Vampires in the Lemon Grove

18. “I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss.” Gomez, The Addams Family

19. “Everything seemed cut from soft black velvet or gold or orange velvet. Smoke panted up out of a thousand chimneys like the plumes of funeral parades. From kitchen windows drifted two pumpkin smells: gourds being cut, pies being baked.” Ray Bradbury, American Author

20. “Halloween is an opportunity to be really creative.” Judy Gold, American Comedian

Halloween Quotations

Halloween Quotations

1. “Harvey wasn’t interested in the clothes, it was the masks that mesmerized him. They were like snowflakes: no two alike. Some were made of wood and of plastic; some of straw and cloth and papier-mâché. Some were as bright as parrots, others as pale as parchment. Some were so grotesque he was certain they’d been carved by crazy people; others so perfect they looked like the death masks of angels. There were masks of clowns and foxes, masks like skulls decorated with real teeth, and one with carved flames instead of hair.” Clive Barker, The Thief of Always

2. “Good-bye, Ichabod Crane. I curse the day you came to Sleepy Hollow.” Katrina Van Tassel, Sleepy Hollow

3. “I was born on the night of Samhain, when the barrier between the worlds is whisper-thin and when magic, old magic, sings its heady and sweet song to anyone who cares to hear it.” Carolyn MacCullough, Once a Witch

4. “Listen to them—the children of the night. What music they make!” Bram Stoker, Irish Author

5. “It is impossible to say how first the idea entered my brain; but once conceived, it haunted me day and night.” Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

6. “You must believe me, it was a horseman, a dead one! Headless!” Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow

7. “He had arranged the arms and legs in letters, and the letters spelled out a single small word: BOO. The three torsos were carefully arranged below the BOO in a quarter-circle, making a cute little Halloween smile. What a scamp.” Jeff Lindsay, Darkly Dreaming Dexter

8. “Halloween shadows played upon the walls of the houses. In the sky the Halloween moon raced in and out of the clouds. The Halloween wind was blowing, not a blasting of wind but a right-sized swelling, falling, and gushing of wind. It was a lovely and exciting night, exactly the kind of night Halloween should be.” Eleanor Estes, The Witch Family

9. “Halloween is an ancient druidic holiday, one the Celtic peoples have celebrated for millennia. It is the crack between the last golden rays of summer and the dark of winter; the delicately balanced tweak of the year before it is given over entirely to the dark; a time for the souls of the departed to squint, to peek and perhaps to travel through the gap.” Jenny Colgan, Welcome To Rosie Hopkins’ Sweetshop Of Dreams

10. “I put a spell on you because you’re mine.” Jay Hawkins, American Singer-Songwriter

11. “They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.” Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

12. “We gladly feast on those who would subdue us.” The Addams Family

13. “Sticky fingers, tired feet; one last house, trick or treat!” Rusty Fischer, American Author

14. “Trick or treat, bag of sweets, ghosts are walking down the street.” Unknown

15. “I must go in. The fog is rising.” Emily Dickinson, American Poet

16. “Things are never quite as scary when you’ve got a best friend.” Bill Waterson, American Cartoonist

17. “I’m wicked through and through.” Elphaba, Wicked

18. “It’s all just a bunch of hocus pocus.” Max, Hocus Pocus

19. “The dead rise again, bats fly, terror strikes and screams echo, for tonight it’s Halloween.” Unknown

20. “When the witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers ’tis near Halloween.” Unknown

Fun Halloween Quotes & Sayings

Fun Halloween Quotes & Sayings

1. “Am I walking toward something I should be running away from?” Shirley Jackson, The Haunting of Hill House

2. “We have had our summer evenings, now for October eves!” Humbert Wolfe, British Poet

3. “On Halloween you get to become anything that you want to be.” Ava Dellaria, American Author

4. “Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can’t see where it keeps its brain.” J.K. Rowling, English Author

5. “Now this is the point. You fancy me a mad. Madmen know nothing. But you should have seen me. You should have seen how wisely I proceeded…” Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

6. “I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” L.M. Montgomery, Canadian Author

7. “This wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. Either it goes or I do.” Oscar Wilde

8. “Hell is empty and all the devils are here.” William Shakespeare, The Tempest

9. “Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within; it had stood so for eighty years and might stand for eighty more. Within, walls continued upright, bricks met neatly, floors were firm, and doors were sensibly shut; silence lay steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House, and whatever walked there, walked alone.” Shirley Jackson, The Haunting of Hill House

10. “It’s Halloween; everyone’s entitled to one good scare.” Brackett, Halloween

11. “That’s the problem. He was dead to begin with.” Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow

12. “Shadows mutter, mist replies; darkness purrs as midnight sighs.” Rusty Fischer, American Author

13. “I love Halloween, and I love that feeling: the cold air, the spooky dangers lurking around the corner.” Evan Peters, American Actor

14. “There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.” George Carlin, American Comedian

15. “A person should always choose a costume which is in direct contrast to her own personality.” Lucy Van Pelt, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

16. “There is a child in every one of us who is still a trick-or-treater looking for a brightly-lit front porch.” Robert Brault, American Author

17. “Shadows of a thousand years rise again unseen. Voices whisper in the trees, ‘Tonight is Halloween!’” Dexter Kozen

18. ““Wench! Trollop! You bucktoothed, mop-riding firefly from hell!” Billy Butcherson, Hocus Pocus

19. “Deep into the darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing/Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.” Edgar Allen Poe, The Raven

20. “Magic is really very simple, all you’ve got to do is want something and then let yourself have it.” Aggie Cromwell, Halloweentown

Halloween Jokes and Riddles

Halloween Jokes and Riddles

1. “No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality.” Shirley Jackson, The Haunting of Hill House

2. “We danced the Mamushka while Nero fiddled, we danced the Mamushka at Waterloo. We danced the Mamushka for Jack the Ripper, and now, Fester Addams, this Mamushka is for you.” Gomez, The Addams Family

3. “I’m a witch every day. Not just for Halloween.” Unknown

4. “Do you believe in destiny? That even the powers of time can be altered for a single purpose? That the luckiest man who walks on this earth is the one who finds… true love?” Dracula

5. “I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey.” The Criminologist, Rocky Horror Picture Show

6. “When the spooks have a midnight jamboree/They break it up with fiendish glee/The ghosts are bad but the one that’s cursed/Is the headless horseman; he’s the worst/That’s right, he’s a fright on Halloween night! When he goes a joggin’ ‘cross the land/Holding his noggin in his hand/Demons take one look and groan/And they hit the road to parts unknown/Beware, take care he rides alone! The Headless Horseman, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

7. “There is nothing that gives more assurance than a mask.” Collette, French Author

8. “Hocus pocus. Time to focus.” Unknown

9. “Be afraid, be very afraid.” Ronnie, The Fly

10. “Nothing on Earth so beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night.” Steve Almond, American Short Story Writer

11. “I’m a homicidal maniac. They look just like everyone else.” Wednesday Addams, The Addams Family

12. “Every day is Halloween, isn’t it? For some of us.” Tim Burton, American Filmmaker

13. “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… and spiders.” Unknown

14. “The farther we’ve gotten from the magic and mystery of our past, the more we’ve come to need Halloween.” Paula Guran, American Author

15. “I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color.” Wednesday Addams, The Addams Family

16. “A mask tells us more than a face.” Oscar Wilde, Irish Poet

17. “It’s a full moon tonight. That’s why all the weirdos are out.” Dani, Hocus Pocus

18. “Maybe now you’ll never slime a guy with a positron collider, huh?” Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters

19. “I’ve seen enough horror movies to know that any weirdo wearing a mask is never friendly.” Elizabeth, Friday the 13th

20. “Werewolves howl. Phantoms prowl. Halloween’s upon us now.” Richelle E. Goodrich, American Author

Classic Halloween Quotes

Classic Halloween Quotes

1. “Witch and ghost make merry on this last of dear October days.” Unknown

2. “There is a town, two days journey to the north in the Hudson Highlands. It is a place called Sleepy Hollow. Have you heard of it?… An isolated farming community, mainly Dutch. Three persons have been murdered there, all within a fortnight. Each one found with the head lopped off… Clean as dandelion heads, apparently. You will take these experimentations of yours to Sleepy Hollow, and there you will detect the murderer. Bring him here to face our good justice. Will you do this?” The Burgomaster, Sleepy Hollow

3. “Well, fancy! We desire children.” Winifred Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

4. “Men say that in this midnight hour, the disembodied have power.” William Motherwell, Scottish Poet

5. “Halloween wraps fear in innocence, as though it were a slightly sour sweet. Let terror, then, be turned into a treat… ” Nicholas Gordon, Poet

6. “The moon has awoken with the sleep of the sun, the light has been broken; the spell has begun.” Midgard Morningstar

7. “If human beings had genuine courage, they’d wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween.” Douglas Copeland, Canadian Author

8. “”A house is never still in darkness to those who listen intently; there is a whispering in distant chambers, an unearthly hand presses the snib of the window, the latch rises. Ghosts were created when the first man woke in the night.” J.M. Barrie, Scottish Author

9. “There is magic in the night when pumpkins glow by moonlight.” Unknown

10. “The rain pattered dismally against the panes, and my candle was nearly burnt out, when, by the glimmer of the half-extinguished light, I saw the dull yellow eye of the creature open.” Mary Shelley, Frankenstein

11. “I am all in a sea of wonders; I doubt; I fear; I think strange things, which I dare not confess to my own soul.” Bram Stoker, Irish Author

12. “To live without you, only that would be torture.” Gomez, The Addams Family

13. “Halloween is not only about putting on a costume, but it’s about finding the imagination and costume within ourselves.” Elvis Duran, Radio Show Personality

14. ““It reeks of children!” Mary Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

15. “By the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes.” William Shakespeare, Macbeth

16. “‘Tis the night—the night of the graves delight and the warlocks are at their play; Ye think that without the wild winds shout, but no, it is they—it is they.” Arthur Cleveland Coxe, American Writer

17. “She used to tell me that a full moon was when mysterious things happen and wishes come true.” Shannon A. Thompson, American Author

18. “On Halloween, witches come true; wild ghosts escape from dreams. Each monster dances in the park.” Nicholas Gordon, Poet

19. “There is something haunting in the light of the moon.” Joseph Conrad, Polish-British Writer

20. “Have you come to sing pumpkin carols?” Linus, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

Above are Best Funny Halloween Quotes do quoteplus.net synthesized and share with you. I hope you enjoyed our gathered collection of the Best Funny Halloween Quotes. Please share with your friends on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. Thanks for reading!

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